It still isn't enough.

I still feel.. as if it's not enough. It just isn't enough. I've not been appreciating people enough though I know I'm capable of doing so. At this point, I'm not sure if I'm apologetic, or lost in a "I don't know where to start and what else to do" sense. 

People, need to know that people need them. It's human. It's nature. And it's us. Just us. 

You reach a point where you just want to lay everything aside and be free to express freedom. You realise, how you've been digging a hole right where you're standing. You're falling. 

I've been striving, and I'm feeling more tired every single day I spend.. striving. I strive to accomplish, to complete, to relief myself of assignments. 

Perhaps it's simply time to stop. 

People have lost people. And it hurts. But people, still have people.

(Bean friend, this one's for you. It has been tough on you, that I know. But you still have people.)

"For a few moments, the world seemed to stop turning, there, as he stood on that street. The ground was so bright with sunshine that his eyes stung. He could hear cars racing past him on the road into town. But everyone and everything that he knew seemed so distant, so far away. he didn't care about living or working, he didn't know who he was, or why he should continue being."

- Curtis Adler, January Colours

I've not been unhappy with my life. My life has actually been relatively good. I've just been striving too hard. 

These words hit me back in the face, reminding me that I don't have to do what I've been doing, all this while. 

Why are you striving these days?

Why are you trying to earn grace?

Why are you crying, let Me lift up your face,

Just don't turn away.

Why are you looking for love?

Why are you searching as if I'm not enough?

To where will you go child? 

Tell Me where will you run, to where will you run.

And I'll be by your side, wherever you fall.

In the dead of night, whenever you call.

And please don't fight these hands that are holding you,

My hands are holding you.

Look at these hands, and My side.

They swallowed the grave on that night, 

When I drank the world's sin, so I could carry you in.

And give you life, I want to give you life.

Cause I, I love you. 

I want you to know, 

That I, I love you.

I'll never let you go.

It's time to stop now. It's time to take a step back and.. slow down. It's time to strive, to stop striving. Even if I strive, it's a strive solely, and only for Jesus.